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Yesterday, was very eventful.

I experienced the joy of birth and the sorrow of death, in the same day. Then there came the in-betweens. Lets start from the beginning of the day.

Without the help of my alarm clock again, woke up at 9am. It’s getting annoying because I’m not getting enough sleep everyday. Anyways, getting ready and all, I ended up stuck in the porch, not able to go anywhere.

Because my cat has given birth to two kittens (so far..) today!

Following were the first thoughts in my mind:

Shit. Have to find kittens every morning again

It’s been a good 2 years since we had to do this every morning. They would be hidden under the car or behind the tyre or anywhere lah.. But still we have to account for each cat, to make sure that we wouldn’t run over them, again. My dad had ran over a few because firstly, back then we had a garden, with grass. Good camouflage for those dark coloured cats. Secondly, we had a .. um.. brain damaged cat before. She loved sitting behind the car to be ran over. We’ve tried to prevent as much as possible, but it’s inevitable lah. Got ran over one day.

So that’s the story behind that thought.

After taking 15 minutes just to move the two kittens and the new mother of two stupid blind kittens (lol. don’t blame me for saying that.. I have my reasons..) I finally got out from the house.

Got to Chung Lern’s place later than my usual lateness. He’s used to it already anyways. Brought me to Kwanon Service Center in Saujana, to get my camera’s shutter button fixed. Without him and his CPS membership, I might be stuck without a camera for 5 working days. Now it’s only 2 working days, but still with the coming public holidays, I’m stuck without a camera for 5 days. BLEH.

Now I’m on borrowed gear, thanks to Chung Lern again.

Had the best Milo, again, ever.

Went to pick up a friend for a movie. While waiting, I witnessed something I’ve seen before. Years ago when I was younger, there was this cat walking around the pavement. As a kid, I chased it and it got shocked and ran across the road.

Cutting the story shot, I got the cat killed in a car accident.

Today, it was a little different. I was in the car, still waiting for my friend who just blurfully woke up 5 minutes before I arrived. Was checking out CL’s spare camera and trying to get used to it. While playing around with it, a lorry passed by, about 50kmph I estimate. Fast within a housing estate.

You should skip the next paragraphs if you’re not ready to read about death. In other words, stop reading. What I’m about to write is what I saw after that. Consider yourself warned. Click on read more to continue.

While I didn’t saw it as it happened because the camera was still on my face, looking at other things. At the corner of my eye, I saw something moving quite a lot. At first glance, I saw a cat jumping up and down like it was playing with a ball. Then it began to grind against the floor. Then I realised, something wasn’t right. I saw blood squirting out from its head.

Friend’s neighbour was looking over, with her hands covering her mouth, shocked with what she saw. I guess she couldn’t take it, and she went back into the house. I was sitting in my car, facing the dying.

This is not the first time witnessing a death of a cat by a vehicle. 3rd time to be exact. First was mentioned earlier, 2nd was a kitten on a road, got ran over by over a dozen cars. 3rd was this.

While I was watching, I wondered what can I do. Nothing really. I still had my camera in my hand, but was still stunned. When I got back to my senses, I thought to myself, I have to shoot this.

I took two shots while it was dying, 2 more after it died. Car was about 15-20 paces away from the cat.

How often do you face death right in front of your eyes? Going through a friend’s or family’s death/funeral is not the same as this. You don’t see the suffering while dying.

What was going through my mind? I asked myself the same thing. I wasn’t sad, nor was depressed. I just watched it as it died, as if it was a show.

Too much of tv actually blinds you from the reality. Too much of Happy Tree Friends. Sigh

I looked around. The neighbour ran back into the house, no one else was present but me, in the car, facing the cat suffering from all the pain. I don’t feel the pain that the cat is experiencing, nor I was sad either. Like I said, I had no feelings or what so ever. Sadist? I don’t think so.

I looked to my right into my friend’s house, saw another cat. It was just lying under the car, sleeping.

World is still moving, with or without the cat I suppose.

I froze time with that two shots. While I had a fixed lens, which I couldn’t zoom in for a closer look, I guess I’m happy that I couldn’t either. Would you like to see, live, a cat dying at a closer range?

No I wouldn’t.

The cat was spinning in circles, blood still spurting out of it’s head. Another minute later, it began to start tensing, as if the worst part of the suffering is about to come. It’s legs started to stretched wide apart. It’s head stretched backwards. Every muscle was .. forgive my English, ’cause I cant get the right words to describe.. Every muscle was tensed, like you were having muscle cramps.

10 seconds later, it ended. It finally died. Loss of blood, head trauma, internal injuries.

I got out of my car, while I’m pretty sure I wasn’t pale, walked over to the dead cat, stopping about 5 paces away, and shot 2 more photos.

I walked away. Went to the sleeping cat, looked at it.

Friend came out, told her about the dead cat which she didn’t noticed while getting into my car. Another car passed by, stopped right in front of the dead cat. Reversed, realigned and avoided the deceased. I had a larger width, drove over.

Life went on. Watched a movie, Transporter 3. Had lunch, took a nap in the car, sent friend home. Went to KL, met up with DGMB for dinner and Comedy Night, had our dinner remains stolen by a begger, had supper, came home.

I wasn’t disturbed at all by what I saw earlier, till now.

On the brighter side, read this again if you have.

I wanted to talk, but I didn’t want to ruin your night, love.